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You Will...

Forwarded from rec.humor.funny.   I found it oddly appropriate.

---

[ This joke is the original work of Fred Wheeler and Jeff Sorenson (a
hysterical conspiracy theorist).  It is a parody of recent AT&T
commercials that ask "Have you ever read a book from around the
world?" and respond "You will, and the company that will bring it to
you is AT&T." ]


Have you ever received an automated sales pitch,
  while you were still in your pajamas?

Have you ever had thousands of calls all over 
  the world charged to your stolen account number?

Have you ever had your paycheck deleted
  by faceless intruders from across the globe?

Have you ever had an employer know more about your 
  whereabouts and activities than your spouse?

Have you ever been snuffed to dust by a 
  satellite laser while lying on the beach?

                   ______ 
                  |      |
                  |      |
                  | You  |
                  |      |
                  | Will |
                  |      |
                  |______|


And the company that will bring this to you

                  is AT&T


-----
  Fred Wheeler        [email protected]
  Jeff Sorensen       [email protected]

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