Sarcasm for Jody. [WAS: Top Ten Corporate Security Needs?]

[attila@primenet.com]

In <199611151336.IAA00800@clipper.hq.tis.com>, on 11/15/96 
   at 08:35 AM, Jody C Patilla <jcp@tis.com> said:

:> "The Top Ten Corporate Security Needs of MIS"
:> 

:Since Mark Riggins wants free assistance in doing his marketing research,
:I can certainly oblige, but I would have to say that my clients tell me
:there are only three things they want:

:1. Total security.
:2. Totally transparent access from everywhere.
:3. And all of it for free.

:and there you have it, sports fans!
:- jcp

        ...truer words were never spoken;  and, when there is a problem,
    the man will call up and say "It dont work!..."  to which you ask:
    "OK, _what_ does not work?..."   and this sequence is repeated again
    and again  -ad nauseum--  "..._IT_ dont work!  I keep telling you!"  

       The call escalates all the way to your head freak, who has never
    suffered fools well... (and should never be permitteed to
    talk to a real customer, much less a prospective customer)...

        The probably simple problem (Maybe  ...it was unplugged?) is 
    resolved by the guru asking the client: "...why in the fuck would 
    you do something as 'stupid and ignorant' as _that_?!?).   

        Of course, the resolution is a lost customer....   "Minor
    problem,.." says the guru: "he's a jerk, we dont need him...."

        And, redder than a russian beet, cradling the talking instrument
    with plastic shattering impact, our beloved peter-principle
    corporate honcho screams at his staff:  "...I told you stupid nerds
    you should have gone with Bill Gates --someone smart!"

            -attila
--
    Cyberspace and Information are Freedom!  
        FUCK your WIPO, too. 
                -attila