Re: Strange Looks

[Toto <toto@sk.sympatico.ca>]

Mike Denney wrote:

 Subject:     new regulations
 Sent:        2/25/97 11:31 PM
 Received:    2/25/97 3:49 PM
 From:        Ken Wallace, kwallace@pragma.com
 To:          larry@dentistat.com

 TO ALL EMPLOYEES

It has been brought to the management's attention that some individuals
have been using foul language in the course of normal conversation
between employees.  Due to complaints from some more easily offended
workers, this conduct will no longer be tolerated.

The management does, however, realize the importance of each person
being able to properly express their feelings when communicating with
their fellow employees.  Therefore the management has compiled the
following code phrases, so that the proper exchange of ideas and
information can continue.

Old Phrase                            New Phrase
----------                            ----------

No fucking way                         I'm not certain that's feasible.

You've got to be shitting me           Really?

Tell someone who gives a fuck          Perhaps you should check with ...

Ask me if I give a fuck                Of course I'm concerned.

It's not my fucking problem            I wasn't involved in that
project.

What the fuck?                         Interesting behavior.

Fuck it, it won't work                 I'm not sure I can implement
this.

Why the fuck didn't you tell me        I'll try to schedule that.
  that sooner?

When the fuck do you expect me to      Perhaps I can work late.
  do this?

Who the fuck cares?                   Are you sure it's a problem?

He's got his head up his ass          He's not familiar with that
problem.

Eat shit                              You don't say.

Eat shit and die                      Excuse me?

Eat shit and die motherfucker         Excuse me, sir?

What the fuck do they want from me    They weren't happy with it?

Kiss my ass                           So you'd like help with it?

Fuck it.  I'm on salary               I'm a bit overloaded at the
moment.

Shove it up your ass                  I don't think you understand.

This job sucks                        I love a challenge.

Who the hell died and made you boss   You want me to take care of this?

Blow me                               I see.

Blow yourself                         Do you see?

Another fucking meeting               Yes, we should discuss this.

I really don't give a shit            I don't think it will be a
problem.

Fuck you                              How nice.  How very nice!

-- 
Toto
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"The Xenix Chainsaw Massacre"
http://bureau42.base.org/public/xenix/xenbody.html