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[Bienfait Nutly News] THE RECENTLY DISBANDED CANADIAN CYPHERPUNK ROAD
Rangers drown their sorrows at the First Daily Bienfait Wine Tasters
Keg Party, held at the Coaldust Saloon in DoWell, Saskatchewan.
The RoadPunks were the toast of the town last week, when they acquired
the Road Rage Control Contract awarded by the Canadian Emotional Crimes
Commission.
They were also the toast of the town last night (any excuse for a party,
eh?), when the contract was revoked as a result of an internal argument
within RoadPunk ranks that turned into an ugly free-for-all on the
TransCanada Highway which quickly became a real-life demolition
derby which injured many innocent, passing travelers, as well.
The trouble started when some of the Canadian CypherPunks took offense
to some of the actions by various of their American counterparts, who
had been invited up to participate in enforcement of the new Emotional
Crimes Laws.
Tim May, the !Diplomatic Representative of the American faction, angered
the Canadians when he stopped a man who had cut him off in heavy traffic
and told him, "You drive like a Chinaman, chop, chop." The Canadians
were momentarily appeased after May agreed that, while in Canada, he
would treat people of Oriental ancestry with respect, and discriminate
against wagon-burners and rag-heads, according to local customs.
All hell broke loose, however, when May then fired several shots into
the side of a passing car which was driving in a perfectly normal
fashion, explaining, "He might not have cut me off, but you can bet
your ass he cut off someone, somewhere, sometime..." and then refused
to allow the Canadian CypherPunks to borrow his illegally imported
gun to play with.
Local and federal law enforcement officials were persuaded to drop
all charges against the RoadPunks, in return for Peter Trei signing
over the Canadian rights for use of the Adrenalyzer, which measures
the amount of adrenaline in a driver's blood. It is reported to be
an early prototype of the Trei Transponder, developed in a secret
underground CypherPunks laboratory, by Reptilian CypherPunks.
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