THE ONLY WAY TO UNSUBSCRIBE

[David Mazieres <dm@amsterdam.lcs.mit.edu>]

> From: Mathew Ellman <mellman@niia.net>
> Date: Mon, 13 May 1996 16:11:54 -0500
> 
> TO ALL MEMBERS, 
>         IM TIRED OF ALL THIS SHIT I HAVE UNSUBSCRIBED MANY TIMES AND ALL I
> GET IS SOME STUPID ASS REPLY ABOUT CLOSED LIST OR ADDRESS NOT MATCHING AND I
> GET NO REPLY SO UNLESS YOU ALL WANT TO GET A BUNCH OF UN WANTED BULLSHIT
> (LIKE THE SHIT IM GETING FROM YOU ) I SUGEST SOMEONE FIND A WAY TO GET ME
> THE FUCK OFF THIS LIST . I HAVE GOT IN TOUCH WITH THE PESON THE REPLY TELL
> ME TO AND NO REPLY. IM TIRED OF ALL THIS SHIT. 

As many of you know, the secret to getting off the cypherpunks mailing
list is closely guarded and only even understood by a few, highly
skilled cryptographers.  The problem is that if there were any simple
way of sending a simple mail message saying, "hey get me off this
list", then the NSA could simply forge this message for every member
of the list thereby suppressing all the subversive information
discussed on this mailing list.

An alternative would be to require a cryptographically signed
unsubscribe message.  However, even then we would run the risk of the
NSA cracking our private keys with their superior technology.
Moreover, President Clinton has made it illegal to use cyptography in
many countries other than the United States, so that foreigners would
still not be able to unsubscribe.

This leaves only one solution, and has resulted in the cypherpunks
philosophy:  "Once a cypherpunk, always a cypherpunk."  Anyone who
joins the cypherpunk mailing list must remain on the mailing list for
the rest of his existence.  Unbeatable, you may think.  How can I get
off the mailing list if there is no way to unsubscribe?

Well, I will now reveal the secret of leaving the cypherpunks mailing.
Before reading further, however, I must ask that you become a US
citizen or permanent resident if you are not one already.  You must
also agree not to discuss this information with any foreigners, as
providing any kind of assistance to non-US cryptographers is a federal
crime for American cicizens.

Now, though you must remain a cypherpunk for the rest of your
existence, you will be removed from the mailing list when you cease to
exist.  The trick to unsubscribing is therefore to convince the
cypherpunks majordomo and the NSA that you non longer exist, when in
fact you really do.  Though for years cypherpunks have thought this
ment cancelling one's E-mail account, there is, in fact, a second,
secret escape route from cypherpunks:  exit code 67.

That's right, if your local mailer exits with code 67 on receipt of
each cypherpunks mail message, you will suddenly seem to have
disappeared.  The cypherpunks will simply believe that the NSA finally
got to you, and that nothing more can be done to communicate with you.
All the while, though, you can continue exchanging private E-mail on
topics other than cryptography.

How then, do you use exit code 67?  First, you must create a file
called "cypherpunks-filter" which contains the following:


#!/bin/csh
setenv PATH /bin:/usr/bin
set username=`id | sed -e 's/).*//' -e 's/.*(//'`
set homedir=~$username
set tmpfile=$homedir/.mailtmp.$$
cat > $tmpfile
if ( { egrep -q '^Sender: owner-cypherpunks@toad.com' \
		$tmpfile } ) then
	rm -f $tmpfile
	exit 67
endif
(rm -f $tmpfile; exec /bin/mail -d $username) < $tmpfile


Then, create a file called ".forward" in your home directory.  In this
file, place the following line:


|"IFS=' '&&exec csh /path/to/cypherpunks-filter #yourlogname"


You must replace '/path/to/cypherpunks-filter' with the actual path of
the the file you just created, and you must replace `yourlogname' with
your actual log name.  After you have done this, you will stop
receivingn all cypherpunks E-mail.  Eventually, you will even be
removed from the mailing list.  Be aware, however, that this procedure
is illegal in Georgia unless you first legally change your name to
"Mailler Daemon".